Monday, July 25, 2016

Understanding the 3 Dimensions of Emotions by Sam Alibrando

          Just as there are three dimensions of the physical world (height, width and depth), there are three dimensions of the interpersonal world–power, love and mindfulness. How well we learn to navigate them directly corresponds with how well we live our lives, how happy and fulfilled we feel.

Human reactivity is the source of most of our interpersonal problems and pain. The 3Dimensions of Emotions introduces working the triangle, a unique practice that provides a compelling yet practical road map that can help you move from painful reactivity to productive proactivity in your relationships. And it works just as successfully for a CEO of a Fortune 500 company as it does for a parent struggling to communicate with a teenager.

It’s impossible to talk about Red(Power), Blue(Heart), and Yellow(Mind) independently of one another. They can only be truly understood in context. And positive change can only happen with the constructive balance in each dimension. You can no more consider Heart from Power from Mind than you can take the literal human heart, the skeletal-muscular system, from the brain. They exist together. They either work together or they work against each other but they in real life they cannot be separated.

Here we take a look at an excerpt of Chapter 7 Synergy and Finding Balance in All Our Relationships

In Chapter 4, I invited the reader to imagine a world without Red(Power). At first it sounds great: A world where there is no fighting or hatred. Where people do not attack, malign, envy, or hate. But imagination can take us only so far until we realize this world without Red(Power) would be a world lacking any distinctiveness and diversity. A world full of only Green(Peace) (Yellow + Blue) would also be a world of passivity. There would be no progress, no assertiveness, no effort, no fighting for justice. The fact is that we have no choice; there is no world without Red(Power). The only choice that we have is to incorporate +Blue and +Yellow to make the Red(Power) of high quality.

And there is no world without Blue(Heart). Can you imagine a heartless world, a world without love or care or regard for others? Can you picture a world without cooperation or collaboration and teamwork? It would be a world full of sociopaths. Sociopaths have a relative incapacity for empathy and true care for others. For the most part, they do things out of selfish expediency. What would a world full of sociopaths look like? It would be a world of exploitation and mutual deprivation and destruction.

And there can be no world, as we know it, without Yellow(Mind). There would be only animalistic urges without regard for rule of law and “truth.” It would be a society dominated by immediate impulses. There would be no self-control. Sigmund Freud introduced us to the idea of the “id.” The id is the part of the mind in which innate instinctive impulses and primary processes are manifest. Without Yellow(Mind) these primary processes would be the only process and would generate a world of utter mayhem.

The integrity to our emotional life lies in the fact that we exist in a world made up of three relational dimensions. And we cannot understand our emotional or relational life apart from the three dimensions taken together. (It is for this reason that I use a triangle to indicate the interconnectedness of the three dimensions.) Take, for example, the important issue discussed in the previous three chapters of convergence, divergence, and observance. All human beings are connected to each other (biologically and energetically) and yet at the same time we are distinct from one another based on numerous variables (intelligence, personality, race, gender, political affiliation, religion, and culture). And last, but not least, we observe the tension between convergence and divergence. The Yellow(Mind) dimension allows us to tolerate the apparent contradiction between convergence and divergence so we can respect each other’s differences without prejudice, while at the same time recognizing all that makes us “one” without losing our uniqueness.

As we noted in Chapter 2, if even one of the dimensions is avoided out of fear, Ego, or habit, the other dimensions will go out of balance and manifest negative (below-the-line) low-quality attitudes and relational behaviors. This is what happens when we become reactive. We are thrown out of balance. That’s the bad news. Here’s the good news: When we integrate the positive aspects of all three dimensions in our responses to others and the world, we function in that moment at a transcendent level.

Fully human, fully alive people are fully engaged in all the three dimensions in a positive, dynamic, and integrated (synergistic) way. Each positive aspect of one dimension augments the other two aspects until we can relate at the pinnacle of the Interpersonal Triangle. We manifest and experience fullness and flow in the optimal energy field. This is peak human functioning—whether it is a spouse with his partner, a parent with a child, a leader with her executive team, an organizational culture with its employees, or a government with its people. The goal of this book is to help people and organizations grow in the direction of this lofty human ideal—finding the balance of power, heart, and mindfulness in all our relationships.

This describes what we have called in this book the human sweet spot: The psychological place where we live most dynamically with the least amount of energy expended and the most positive energy generated. We discussed in Chapters 2 and 3 the idea that we are all made up of energy. The energy that is emitted from the balanced integrated human being (or group or organization) operating from the sweet is positive and contagious. Generally balanced people make other people around them relax and feel positive. Inadvertently they bring out the best in everyone they encounter. This is true for organizations as well. There are endless studies demonstrating that psychologically healthy workplaces produce an environment or “culture” that naturally brings out the best in its people.

One implication of reaching for this sweet spot has to do with changing our inner, family, and corporate narratives. Most of our inner personal narratives about the self and the world we live in are informed, if not distorted, by our pain-body and Ego, conditioned and artificially reinforced over years of faulty learning. How do we change our inner narratives in a way that reflects the positive aspects of all three dimensions? So, for example, how would we change our narrative of “strength” or power to include heart and mindfulness (+Green)? Or how would we embrace a caring for others that includes keeping good boundaries (+Orange)?

This idea of rewriting our narrative applies to groups as well. Any group of any size that exists for any given length of time eventually creates its own narratives. We call this “organizational culture.” So can a hard-driving corporate culture include some regard for employee work–life balance? Or could Congress include in its narrative about ideological purity also appropriate negotiation and compromise in order to actually get something done?

There are no individuals, families, or organizations that I know of who live in their sweet spot on a consistent basis. I certainly don’t maintain this optimal level of functioning. I’d like to think that maybe there are some people who can fully and constantly live in the high-energy field of the dynamic balance of power, heart, and mindfulness. I just don’t know anyone personally like that. Life is too complicated and challenging for most people to hold up and stay engaged in all three (above-the-line) dimensions. But the times that I do operate from the sweet spot are times of great joy and personal fulfillment. Likewise, I do not know of anyone who has approximated this emotional intelligence without conscious effort. Regardless of how healthy their parents were and how good their genetics they still have some sort of pain-body that will derail them to some degree.

All of us either by current anxiety, ego-defensiveness and/or long-term habit get thrown out of balance when one or more the dimensions are avoided. I call this avoided dimension our least-preferred movement (LPM). Even though our LPM often changes depending on the current challenge or situation, many of us will find that we have a particular movement that we avoid. And what we don’t realize is that when we avoid our least-preferred movement or dimension, we avoid our chance to transcend to our next level of personal capacity.

This is the very basis of Working the Triangle, which we introduced in Chapter 3. As you recall, Working the Triangle is based on the idea that the critical issue to focus on is not what we are doing that is wrong, but what we are not doing that is right. Working the Triangle is a tool that we can use anytime we are thrown out of balance in a relationship. But it is also something that we can practice on an ongoing basis as individuals, groups, and nations to mature and grow. It is a way to become more emotionally intelligent. It is a way to become a better person, spouse, parent, sibling, friend, leader, organization, or government. 

Sam Alibrando, PhD, is an organizational consultant, psychotherapist, author, teacher, workshop facilitator, collaborative mediator, and executive coach. He has worked on the three-dimensional model for nearly 35 years and taught it to thousands of people and counseled numerous executives, clinical clients, and couples. Dr. Alibrando is president of APC, Inc., a psychological consulting firm. He is also a principle consultant at CulturLogix, a company specializing in organizational culture. He is currently an assistant professor at the Chicago School of Professional Psychology, teaching executive coaching. He resides in Pasadena, California.

Thursday, July 21, 2016

Weird News of the Week

Eagle Tries to Eat Little Boy

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Government to Save Ferrets with M&Ms

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Crab Takes Awesome Selfie

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Wednesday, July 13, 2016

Positive News of the Week

Identical Twins Give Birth Exact Same Time

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Captain America Knows Sign Language

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Killer Whale Surprises Cape Cod 

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Wednesday, July 6, 2016

Weird News of the Week

Mysterious Black Ring Over Disneyland 

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Library Cat Wrongfully Fired

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Man Swims In Cola and Mentos

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Thursday, June 30, 2016

Creature of the Month: Hand of the Yeti by Micah Hanks

The Strange Adventures of the Pangboche “Yeti Finger”

One of the longest held, and most contentious arguments against the existence of creatures like the Sasquatch has been the apparent lack of physical evidence. To counter this criticism, many researchers have argued that, in order to prove the existence of the Sasquatch — and perhaps then be able to protect them — we will likely require a body.

However, a number of decades ago one hopeful adventurer and Bigfoot enthusiast, former British big game hunter Peter Byrne, believed he had found the holy grail of cryptozoological research: an actual mummified hand that had been retrieved from the body of a Yeti.

The story is an odd one, and at times, the turns it takes border the sensational. Byrne recounts that he had been on a Yeti expedition in the region that had spanned nearly three years. “Moving through the Himalayas, we found ourselves camped at a temple called Pangboche,” he recalled of the trip. “The temple had a number of Sherpa custodians, and one evening, I heard one of them speaking Nepalese, which I speak.” The two began to chat, and eventually the discussion came around to the object of Byrne’s quest: the mythical Yeti.

“He told me that in the temple, they had the hand of a Yeti. Which had been there for many, many years.” The Sherpa asked Byrne if he would like to see it, and that evening he was taken to view the strange, twisted remains of a large, human-looking hand with darkened skin, and long curved nails.

“It was covered with crusted, black broken skin,” Byne recalled, and noted that it had been very oily, because of the candles that burned in the room the hand was kept in. Naturally, Byrne’s fascination had been piqued by the strange, chance discovery, and he initiated a prolonged correspondence with the help of runners, who carried messages to the border for him that were mailed to his contacts, Dr. Osman Hill, and Texas millionaire Tom Slick, the expedition’s benefactor. Through these correspondences, a meeting was arranged in London, at which time Byrne and the others devised a plan to retrieve the hand, or at least a portion of it, so that it might be brought back to London for scientific study.

“You’ve got to get this hand,” Dr. Hill told Byrne at a luncheon once he arrived. Byrne, of course, had asked upon discovery of the relic whether he might “borrow” it, but the Llamas at the Pangboche temple had refused, believing misfortune would befall them if the hand were ever removed. Hill then suggested that, if not an entire hand, perhaps a finger could be removed.

“It would have to be replaced,” Byrne said, to which Hill responded, “well, replace it with a human finger.” At that moment, reaching under the table, Dr. Hill produced a bag, from which he removed a similarly weathered-looking human hand. Of this, Slick (who also joined them for this meeting), was recalled having remarked, “I take it that’s not desert!”

“I took [the hand] back to Nepal,” Byrne said, “and sat down with the Llamas, and cut off one of the fingers from the Yeti hand, and replaced it with a human finger.” Drilling through the carpal bones, Byrne reassembled the temple’s unique item with wire, allowing it to maintain the appearance of being unaltered; Byrne even went to the trouble of painting the human finger with iodine, which effectively gave it the same aged appearance of the purported Yeti hand to which it had been attached.

Now, with the exchange having successfully been made, the problem of getting the specimen back to London had presented itself, since Byrne knew the item would be confiscated if it were found during Indian customs inspection. Tom Slick proposed a plan; he told Byrne to travel to Calcutta, and entrust the finger to “a Mr. and Mrs. Stewart,” who were staying at the hotel. Upon arrival, Byrne went to the desk, and asked for the man by the name Slick had advised, and was subsequently invited to the man’s room. As knocked at the door, Byrne was astonished to find that the “Mr. Stewart” who answered was none other than American actor Jimmy Stewart!

Leaving the potentially ground-breaking specimen in Stewart’s possession, the actor and his wife, Gloria, stashed the finger from Pangboche in Mrs. Stewart’s lingerie case. As planned, the belongings made it through Indian customs with no trouble, but once they arrived at Heathrow airport in London, the lingerie case was missing. Two days later, while the couple were staying at the Dorchester Hotel, a customs agent arrived wishing to speak with them. Once the young customs official appeared outside their room, they saw he was carrying the missing lingerie box, and immediately feared that the mysterious finger might have been discovered; it would involve more than a bit of explaining to help customs officials understand how, exactly, a mummified human finger had made its way into the midst of Gloria’s unmentionables.

“Eventually,” Byrne recalled of the incident, “Gloria got around to asking them, ‘by the way, I notice the case is still locked’.”

“Of course madame,” the young agent said, blushing slightly. “We would never open a lady’s lingerie case.”

Despite the successful retrieval of the mysterious finger to London, after its arrival the specimen had remained mysterious. Dr. Hill managed to determine its hominid origins, suggesting that the hand bore similarity to that of a Neanderthal. However, after some time, the finger was passed into one of the many collections at the Royal College of Surgeons museum in London, where it would remain for half a century.

Over the years, few developments would emerge regarding the case of the mysterious Pangboche hand, and its now-missing finger. In the early 1990s, it came to light that anthropologist George Agogino had obtained samples that were taken once the finger was brought to London with the Stewarts. New studies were carried out with these samples, the results of which aired on the popular NBC television show Unsolved Mysteries, which asserted that the samples appeared to be a “near match”, but were likely not actually human. Though highly tantalizing, the non-identification of the Pangboche specimens seemed to do little to enliven the debate over the existence the Yeti at the time, and soon, the hand, and its mysterious detached finger, were largely forgotten again.

It wasn’t until 2011 that the finger was rediscovered at the Royal College of Surgeons, a turn of events that prompted one BBC reporter to contact Peter Byrne and invite him to return to London for an examination of the finger. That December, scientists in Edinburgh were able to study the finger, and conclusively determine that it contained human DNA; after decades in limbo, the debate over the origins of the Pangboche Yeti hand was finally resolved.

While unable to offer that long-sought “proof” of the existence of the mysterious Yeti, the Pangboche hand affair remains, without question, one of the most colorful stories in the long history of cryptozoological research.

Micah Hanks is a writer, researcher, lecturer, and radio personality whose work addresses a variety of scientific concepts and unexplained phenomena. Over the last decade, his research has examined a variety of approaches to studying the unexplained, cultural phenomena, human history, and the prospects of our technological future as a species as influenced by science.

He is author of several books, including his 2012 New Page Books release, The UFO SingularityThe Ghost RocketsMagic, Mysticism and the Molecule, and Reynolds Mansion. Hanks produces a weekly podcast, The GralienReport, which follows his research.

Wednesday, June 29, 2016

Positive News of the Week

Dad's Tattoo Matches Son's Surgery Scar

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Dog Realized He Can Stand In Water

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The Phantom Limb

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Tuesday, June 28, 2016

Fall 2016 New Release Announcment

Our Fall 16 list features nine New Releases this Season. Find out more by visiting the individual book links below. 

The Haunting of Asylum 49: Chilling Tales of Aggressive Spirits, Phantom Doctors, and the Secret of Room 666
By Richard Estep and Cami Andersen
August 16 Release
This unassuming former medical facility outside Salt Lake City stands next to a graveyard and is home to a full-contact Halloween haunt with a difference: The ghosts are all too real, and they are very willing to interact with the living. 

Fact, Fiction, and Flying Saucers: The Truth Behind the Misinformation, Distortion, and Derision by Debunkers, Government Agencies, and Conspiracy Conmen
By Stanton T. Friedman and Kathleen Marden
September 16 Release
Fact, Fiction, and Flying Saucers examines the wealth of archival documents that clearly demonstrate this cooperative disinformation effort and refute a clear conspiracy to deny the existence of UFOs. Friedman and Marden set the record straight by examining politically motivated misinformation and presenting the compelling evidence that separates fact from fiction. 

The Path of Presence: 8 Awareness-Expanding Energy Practices to Ignite Your Purpose
By Synthia Andrews
October 16 Release
The light of your Presence is the radiance of your essential self. The Path of Presence introduces you to eight energy-based, awareness-expanding practices that will awaken your inner light and magnify your Presence. You’re invited on a journey into your heart and into the heart of the universe. 

The Pleiadian Promise: A Guide to Attaining Groupmind, Claiming Your Sacred Heritage, and Activating Your Destiny
By Christine Day
February 17 Release
A pure light frequency has activated the sacred timing of an important aspect of the Pleiadians commitment to us as a human race. This is what the Pleiadians refer to as fulfilling the Promise that was set in place lifetimes ago. Now is the time for them to reveal to us as a human race the sacred aspects of who we are and what we need to do to become fully realized and fulfill our role on our Earth plane. 

Eternal Dharma: How to Find Spiritual Evolution Through Surrender and Embrace Your Life's True Purpose
By Vishnu Swami
January 17 Release
Eternal Dharma distills the essence of 5,000 years of spiritual wisdom, teaching us about the very nature of reality and how we can live powerful, effective, and fulfilled lives. It teaches and inspires us to take powerful action and reach enlightenment and pure, transcendental love. 

The Lost History of Ancient America: How Our Continent Was Shaped by Conquerors, Influencers, and Other Visitors from Across the Ocean
By Frank Joseph
October 16 Release
In ancient times, the sea was not an impassable barrier separating our ancestors from the outside world, but a highway taking them to every corner of it.  New evidence is presented of transoceanic visitors to America, hundreds, even thousands, of years before Christopher Columbus was born. Its 20 eminent contributors are experts in a variety of fields, from botany, biology, and prehistoric engineering to underwater archaeology, archaeo-astronomy, and Bronze Age warfare. 

Ancient Giants of the Americas: Suppressed Evidence and the Hidden History of a Lost Race
By Xaviant Haze
November 16 Release 
Did a race of ancient giants once inhabit the Americas?  Analyzing the historical and archaeological evidence, Xaviant Haze provides ample proof that our ancestors in the ancient Americas were much taller and a lot more mysterious than we imagine. 

Immortality of the Gods: Legends, Mysteries, and the Alien Connection to Eternal Life
By Nick Redfern
December 2016 Release
Ancient aliens may well have uncovered the secrets behind slowing, and ultimately completely stopping, the aging process. History is filled with accounts of fantastic beings, powerful gods, and half-human/half-alien entities that had extraordinarily long lifespans. Many such stories are now largely dismissed as nothing more than the stuff of legend, folklore, and mythology. But what if the accounts are all too real? 

The Sagan Conspiracy: NASAs Untold Plot to Suppress the Peoples Scientists Theory of Ancient Aliens
By Donald L. Zygutis
November 16 Release
Recently rediscovered by the author, Sagan’s lost Stanford paper is the central theme of The Sagan Conspiracy. Groundbreaking research and paradigm-changing material challenges conventional thinking about the People’s Scientist—and maybe even the origins of human society. Sagan even conceived of the likelihood that the ancient Sumerian civilization had been visited and influenced by beings from other worlds as evidenced by ancient manuscripts, among other artifacts.

Wednesday, June 22, 2016

Weird News of the Week

 The Orange Seagull

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Aliens in Australia? 

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A Hawaii Snow Storm

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Wednesday, June 15, 2016

Positive News of the Week

New Zealand's Glow Worm Community

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Girls Gets Doll with Prosthetic Leg

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Norway Bans Deforestation

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Wednesday, June 8, 2016

Weird News of the Week

King Tut's Blade Made of Meteorite

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Planet 9, Stolen Exoplanet

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Giant Gator Strolls Golf Course

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